Monday, June 16, 2008

All Smiles


I'm typing this with my eyes half-closed but I know that if I didn't post this today, then I would never post it. It seems that from day to day, I'm getting lazier to blog =D

Never had I thought I would feel tired of being angry. There seemed to be tiny outbursts everyday. I was like a tornado, lashing out my anger to those around me. My mood swings were unbearable.

Blame them on my hormones =P

Effa was partly right; they seem to be there, but not really. Yeah, that describes it. But honestly, I couldn't really blame the friends though I was kindda frustrated. I know how hard it is to keep in touch. I am one of those friends. Even I feel scared of meeting some of them, even though we were really inseparable once. I'm scared of us judging ourselves. That maybe I couldn't accept the 'new' them and vice versa. More than anything, I don't want to accept the fact that we really couldn't get along that well anymore. And that we have changed more than we have wanted.

Friends. But yeah, there're still there. Just merely visible. But ahah, if you guys ever need me, please know that I'm here =) and always will be.

Okay, I got sidetracked. What I really wanted to say was.....

I got to meet Rina and I got to meet Ctah and I'm happy =)

Rina was back in Miri for 5 days. As brief as that may have sounded, that's 4 nights at home eh! When you think of it that way, it's long right. Fetched her at the airport in the morning (yes, ME! ME!) and bumped into her at the airport again that night. You guys should have guessed by now that we're big fans of Miri Airport. Yeah, it's so BREATHTAKINGLY GORGEOUS, bluek. Then I bumped into her again at Dr. Aziz's the next morning. Then the night before she went back, we hung out at her house until like...3 am. The last time I was there was almost 2 years ago when we had the sleepover after SPM. That was freakingly LONG since her house's just 5 minutes away.We talked like we talked back then. We laughed just like we had laughed back then. It was a relief to be able to tell rather than to write to someone I actually knew well and knew me well. After I got back that night, I thought:

I wasn't afraid anymore.

It suddenly popped into my head. I didn't even know what it meant.

Ok.

Then last night I met Ctah! A few days before I was going back only did I meet her. Brilliant. Now this, needs another post on its own. So yes, I'm stopping here. I need sleep. I need food.

Toodles.

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